Do not eat this blog.

Anonymous asked: How do I train a train?

This was too big an undertaking to just do a simple reply, so I’m explaining this in a full blog post.

How do you operate a locomotive, then? Well, it varies from locomotive to locomotive.

For the purposes of this exercise I will demonstrate the operation of an EMD SD40-2, however these techniques can be applied to most modern diesel locomotives.

(operating a locomotive should be attempted only by trained professionals. Kids, don’t try this at home. You probably wouldn’t have much luck trying it at home anyway, unless you have a railyard in your backyard.)

STEP 1: Get in the cab.

A simple task. Climb the steps, proceed along the walkway on the outside of the locomotive to the cab. Open the door. Go inside.

STEP 2: Turn on the engine.

This can be a little complicated. It’s not like you turn a key and go: there’s a crapload of buttons to press.

Look for the bigass circuit breaker panel. It should be on the wall opposite the wall with the control stand. Flip the gigantic knife switch on the panel (don’t touch the metal bits because you’ll die) and then turn everything on the panel on.

These switches control everything from the A/C to the traction motors to the toilet. (assuming the locomotive is equipped with one [even if it is I recommend that you don’t use it])

Now that there is power to the engine, you have to physically start it.

Head back along the walkway and open up one of the panels. If you’re lucky, it will be the one with the priming switch. If you don’t get it on the first try, keep opening panels until you find it.

Prime the engine and then start it by turning the switch the other way.

Alternatively, watch this Youtube video of what I assume is some idiot breaking into a locomotive and turning it on.

STEP 3: Driving the locomotive.

Head to the control stand at the front of the locomotive.

Let’s look at what we got here:

Notice that there are three brakes but only one throttle.

This is because stopping is more difficult than starting.

TO GO:

1. Insert reverser lever handle into reverser lever slot. I’ve heard that if you don’t have the lever handy, you can jam a screwdriver in there and it will also work.

2. Ask dispatcher for permission to move locomotive. (use the radio)

3. Set reverser lever to “forward” position. (unless you want to go in reverse, in which case you should set it to the “reverse” position.)

4. Release train brakes, independent brakes, and set dynamic brake to position 0.

5. Increase throttle, slowly, until desired speed is reached.

That’s the easy bit.

Stopping is harder.

There are three brakes:

Independant brakes: These set the brakes on the locomotive and any other locomotives attached to the train, but not on the rest of the train. They are advantageous because they work instantly, but they also don’t work on the rest of your 100-car coal drag. Use only when not carrying a load.

Train brake: Applies air brakes along the train.

When there is a lack of pressure in the air brake cylinders, the brakes apply. You can control the rate at which pressure leaves the system, but not the amount that leaves the system. This makes brake application tricky- the system does not respond instantly (depending on the length of the train there can be minutes between brakes working at the front and at the back of the train), and will always go to full application eventually if you leave it.

Usually the best option when large braking force is needed.

Dynamic brakes: These turn the electric traction motors in the wheels of the locomotive into generators. The generators create electricity from the momentum of the train, then burn if off as heat from radiator coils on the back of the locomotive.

Good for speed reduction, not so much for stopping.

Step 4: Turning off the locomotive.

Repeat step 2 backwards.

And that’s it. You now know how to operate an extremely expensive and powerful diesel locomotive. Please use your newfound powers responsibly: a locomotive can do quite a bit of damage in the wrong hands.