Day 18 - Your Beliefs
This is a very broad topic, so I’ll just pick random topics out of Wikipedia’s List of controversial issues to give my beliefs on.
The 2003 invasion of Iraq was for oil.
Everyone hates the ACLU, so they must be doing something good.
Detroit will rise again someday, though not without first demolishing some priceless pieces of early 20th century architecture needlessly.
Gays and Lesbians should be able to marry.
Fox News is fair and unbiased, because they say so.
The Tea Party is completely insane, and its members are grossly overweight. I mean, I could sort of see their point of view if they weren’t so goddamned fat.
Global Warming is great. It means less cold mornings at the train station.
Free Trade is great.
Communism is communist.
Jesus was some guy who has the world’s largest and most enduring fan club.
The world will end in 2012, but three weeks before the Mayans predicted just to fuck with people’s heads.
Creationism was invented by Richard Dawkins so that he could make a bunch of money denying it.
The Pro-Life movement is unfair to women, but the Pro-Choice movement is unfair to unborn babies. So I am Pro-Death: we should kill all babies before they are born to be fair to them. This would also solve the problem of overpopulation.
Cloning is bad, because I couldn’t stand to have to talk to another me.
The Flat Earth Theory is easily verifiable. If we’re all being pulled down by gravity, then why don’t the Australians fall off the earth? What now, scientists?
Major League Baseball has doping problems. The games are still fun to watch, though.
Duke Nukem Forever will be released in late 2011. In the next few weeks, the Chicago Cubs will win the World Series, and they will find Jimmy Hoffa’s corpse. These will be the first signs of the coming apocalypse.
Nuclear Power is cheap and clean energy for the masses. So naturally we can’t use it.
Toxic Waste should be properly disposed of.
Illegal Drugs are illegal. Some of them are really really bad, and some of them aren’t.
Asperger’s Syndrome doesn’t really exist and whoever claims to have it is just too lazy to learn to socialize.
Facebook is pretty cool.
Harry Potter is great until you meet the really weird fans who overdo it. Then you start to hate it.
Al-Jazeera provides pretty decent news, in English.
Censorship of any kind is bad, barring some obscenity laws.
UFOs are only UFOs until they are identified as UFOs. Then they become IFOs. (Identified flying objects.)
